A Doula’s Guide to Building Your Baby Registry
Many of our clients share that creating a baby registry feels overwhelming.
Especially when expecting your first child, it’s so hard to tell which items will be helpful and which ones are mostly marketing gimmicks.
As doulas who have worked with several hundred families, we want to share our best registry tips here. This is not meant to be an exhaustive checklist, just a list of things to consider as you decide what to include on your baby registry.
A note on our general approach
Reflecting the priorities of most of our clients, our recommendations here will be:
on the slightly more minimalist side
conscientious about materials (with a preference for non-plastic items)
based on what we have actually seen be useful for people! (This post does not include any affiliate links.)
From what to include, what to leave out, and how to get started when it feels like an overwhelming task, let's get to it!
Where to create your registry
Creating a registry on Babylist.com allows you to add products from different retailers all in one list. It also allows you to create group gifting options for higher priced items.
Pro tip: We recommend using your Babylist registry as a collection place for all the items you want, rather than shopping from the Babylist store directly. This will give you the most flexibility as far as choosing your preferred brands.
How to get started if it feels overwhelming
We have two different approaches to suggest here.
If any baby-related shopping feels exciting for you: Start with fun stuff. Books, clothes, playthings, nursery decor… whatever aspects of shopping for your little one naturally feel fun for you, start with those to get some momentum.
If you’re more motivated by crossing items off your to-do list: Start with basic “baby gear”. Get staples like transportation items, bottles, sleeping gear, and diapers checked off your list first and you’ll start to feel like compiling the rest of your baby registry is doable.
What to include
Topics included here:
Sleep
A lot of parents like starting out with a bedside bassinet if they aren’t planning to bedshare. The Baby Bay gives you the most access to your baby and flexibility.
We still recommend having a safe setup for bedsharing even if that’s not your primary plan. Research shows that most parents still have their baby in bed with them for at least part of the night even if they didn’t mean to bedshare. So it’s smart to make sure you’re doing this safely just in case.
We highly recommend learning about the history and safety of bedsharing - you will probably be surprised! Dr. James McKenna is the world’s leading research expert on this topic and his book is wonderful: Safe Infant Sleep
Don’t fret too much about how to choose a crib. Here is some basic safety information to help you choose (but most cribs on the market will meet most of these guidelines). We recommend choosing one that fits your needs:
Do you want a crib that fits a certain aesthetic? (Traditional vs. modern, wood vs. metal, etc.)
Do you feel strongly about getting a crib that converts to a toddler/child bed? (Not necessary in our eyes, but some people really want this option)
Many of our clients love the Newton Baby breathable crib mattress (even if their chosen crib already comes with a mattress). The waterproof option comes in handy, but what we’re really after here is the breathability for sleep safety.
If you plan to travel a lot with your little one in the first year or two and don’t plan on primarily bedsharing, then a travel crib (like the Pack ‘n Play) may come in handy
What to skip:
Sleep sacks, especially weighted ones. Sleep sacks are not necessary. Babies can sleep in regular jammies! It's very important to make sure your little one isn't dressed in too many layers for sleep because babies are prone to overheating, and overheating elevates SUIDS risk. And in many sleep environments, a sleep sack over pajamas is one layer too many. Being a little chilly can be an annoyance, but being too warm can be a real safety risk. Weighted sleep sacks are never recommended, because they have been found to suppress babies' breathing and make it harder for their hearts to work appropriately.
We don’t recommend swaddling to sleep routinely because it can cause sleep learning issues later on. But if you want to have a swaddle or two on hand in case they’re helpful in the early days, we reccommend looking for a swaddle that has a zipper or velcro closure (for ease of use, and to keep loose blankets out of your baby's sleeping environment if they break free of the swaddle). You should also look for a lightweight fabric like muslin, to help your baby avoid overheating.
Snoo bassinet. In most cases these cause a lot of problems after the first month or two of life, and weaning away can be a very fraught process. (Marlee sees a lot of ex-Snoo families in her sleep counseling practice.)
Blackout curtains. These can be useful if a lot of artificial light comes into the baby’s room overnight. But they should not be used for daytime sleep.
Sound or white noise machines. They can be nice sometimes, but definitely not a must-have.
Feeding
Almost every family will use bottles at some point. Our favorite combo for nursing parents to encourage practicing a good latch even with bottles is Pigeon silicone super slow flow nipples paired with a compatible bottle of your choice (many of our clients use Lansinoh bottles)
Bottle cleaning equipment:
Bottle brush
Bottle drying rack. There are many popular “grass” versions here. If you’re into those, great! If they’re not your thing aesthetically, try searching for a bamboo option instead.
A bottle sanitizer can be really convenient, especially if you plan on mostly formula feeding or pumping (since you’ll be using bottles quite frequently). Even if you have a dishwasher, bottle sanitizers can save you space in your dishwasher loads, and give the convenience of clean bottles without waiting for a dishwasher load to finish.
If you plan to pump at all: A backpack or bag for your pump with a cooler feature. Being able to store milk safely while you’re working and/or on the go is super helpful.
What to skip:
A breast pump. Most people can get a free pump through their health insurance plan (we recommend the Spectra S1, S2, or Gold)
Diapering
The first big decision to make here is whether you plan to use cloth diapers, disposable diapers, or a combination of both (for example, cloth during the daytime and disposables overnight).
If using cloth:
There are many helpful guides online for supplies you’ll need, from diapers to sprayers, to wet bags and more (including recommendations of how many diapers to have on hand)
We highly recommend reading Laundry Love by Patric Richardson (“The Laundry Evangelist”). There is a TON of conflicting advice out there about how to best wash cloth diapers, but this is the best method we’ve come across.
Keep in mind that despite carefully choosing the cloth diapers you want, it’s possible that what you end up with won’t be the best fit for your little one. Take advantage of buy/sell/trade (BST) groups online if you find yourself needing to swap brands or styles.
If using disposables:
Register for a couple months’ worth of diapers
Register for daytime and overnight diapers if you plan to use different types
Make sure to register for a diaper pail as well
Don’t get too committed to any one brand of diapers before your baby arrives. We recommend registering for packs from a variety of different brands so you can try different brands/sizes and see what works best for your little one.
Don’t forget to choose wipes (some people use cloth wipes with liniment or something similar, other people choose Water Wipes or another disposable wipe of choice). Consider options for what you may want to use while out and about as well (maybe the same as you use at home, maybe something different)
Diaper bag of choice
Transportation
Car seat: All car seats have to pass strict tests and are very protective if used completely correctly. So you can't really go wrong when it comes to choosing a carseat, as long as you are able to install and the one of your choice correctly!
There are all kinds of special features to choose from though, and it could be worth spending some time reading about the different options that various brands offer. Personally we are fans of infant seats that have super adjustable harness height for a fit that is as customized and comfortable as possible at all stages of your little one's growth (such as the no-rethread harness on the UppaBaby Aria Infant Car Seat).
We are also fans of seats that are lightweight (so they're easier to carry) and that have extra safety features like a load leg or anti rebound bar. The Uppa Baby Aria seat linked above fits the bill, so if you would rather not do a bunch of research on this, we consider it to be a very solid option! If you want to do more reading, Car Seats for the LIttles is a great resource.Keep in mind that some cars and car seats don’t play nicely with each other. It’s possible you may not be able to get a safe installation of your chosen car seat in your car, in which case you’ll need to find a different car seat to try.
Pro tip: Studies show that 50-90% of car seats are installed incorrectly, and are therefore not used safely. If you need any help figuring out your car seat, please reach out to Amanda Cagle, a certified Child Passenger Safety Technician, for assistance.
Stroller: There are several factors to consider here, from multi-child options, to wheel type (and whether you prefer something more heavy-duty like a jogging stroller), to whether you can set your baby’s car seat right onto the stroller or need to transfer your little one from their car seat to the stroller, and more. This can get overwhelming pretty quickly! A few options to help you choose:
One easy option is to register for a stroller from the same company as your selected car seat. These can be more expensive, but require less research.
Check and see if your car seat is compatible with the popular Mockingbird stroller
Select a simpler, lower-end stroller for your registry, and upgrade later on as your baby grows if you need to
If you’re really into product research, then you might enjoy the process of comparing features and brands and handpicking an option that feels exactly right for your family
Baby carriers: Many of our clients enjoy babywearing during the infant and toddler years. This is another option that can get overwhelming pretty quickly! Some tips to help you narrow things down:
Meet with a babywearing educator during pregnancy to try on different carriers and get a feel for what you might like. In the Pittsburgh area, we can’t recommend Laura McCarthy highly enough!
You might want to avoid wrap-style carriers if you’re new to babywearing. This style can feel very overwhelming when you’re first learning.
We typically recommend starting out with something like a Baby K’tan, soft structured carrier (Chimparoo and Oscha are favorite brands), or mei tai. Some people also like starting out with a ring sling, but they can also take a little getting used to at first.
Don’t just get an Ergobaby or Baby Bjorn because they seem the most popular. These brands aren’t actually the most comfortable option for many people - individual fit really matters! Speaking of which…
Expect to prefer a different carrier than your partner/co-parent (if applicable). Many families find that they can’t comfortably share baby carriers, and instead prefer to have a different carrier for each primary caregiver to use that fits them well and feels ergonomic. Everyone’s body is different (and this is another reason why meeting with a babywearing educator ahead of time is a great idea). It would make sense to register for a couple (or a few!) different options here.
If you need to change styles at some point, check out buy/sell/trade groups (like this one) if gifted items are past their return window.
Bathing & grooming
We recommend infant bath tubs that fit over a kitchen sink when they’re really little. A lot of our clients like the Cleanwater Tub. The Fridababy Grow-With-Me tub is a different style and also popular.
There are so many options for baby nail clippers that advertise various safety features. In our experience, many of these extra features often get in the way! We feel simple nail clippers are actually a much safer and more effective choice! If you don’t already have a pair like that, add one to your registry.
Some parents also prefer to use nail scissors instead of clippers.
What to skip:
Foam “flower” bath seats (like this). They are prone to mold/mildew, especially in our Pittsburgh climate.
Fancy dremel nail kits. They tend to be overly complicated to use, not very effective at keeping babies' nails short enough to avoid little face scratches, and rough on the delicate skin of babies' fingertips.
Linens
Burp cloths come in really handy with newborns (not just for burping)
Fun fact: Did you know that most babies who are exclusively eating human milk rarely need to be burped?
Swaddle blankets can be handy around the house with a newborn too. A lot of our nursing clients end up using them for some extra support when feeding their baby in a side-lying position (laying down)
You’ll probably want a good supply of wash cloths. They don’t have to be baby specific, as long as they’re pretty soft.
As far as towels go, you may be fine with what you already have, again, as long as they’re pretty soft. Contrary to popular belief, you don’t actually have to own a hooded towel with animal ears in order to be a good parent ;-)
Bibs are really useful once your baby starts eating solid foods around 6 months
Clothing
There are many guides available to help you estimate how much clothing to register for. But usually no matter what is on the registry, loved ones gift clothing because it’s hard to resist those cute onesies at Target!
Our recommendation here is to plan for layers, and to remember items like winter jackets (if needed based on your climate) and sun protection, like hats and baby sunglasses.
What to skip:
Mittens or other hand coverings. Unless you’re using them in very cold weather so you can be outside with your little one in all seasons (which we highly encourage!), we recommend routine use of mittens at home as they can be detrimental to babies’ development.
Health & safety
Baby monitor of choice. Here’s a guide to help you decide what type might work best for you.
Rectal thermometer like this one from Fridababy
Humidifier of choice (check out The Wirecutter’s top picks)
Consider an on-call pediatrics service like Blueberry
Places for your baby to hang out
We highly recommend using a playpen/play yard to create a safe space for your little one to hang out. Bonus points if you have space for one outside too! Bamboo options that can be put into a variety of shapes are popular, like this one from Harppa Baby.
Your high chair of choice for once your little one is big enough to sit up at the table in their own seat. The IKEA Antilop high chair is a popular choice, and there are even after market customization options available.
As your baby becomes more mobile, they may want to spend time with you in the kitchen. Consider registering for a kitchen tower like this one from Harppa Baby.
What to skip:
Baby gyms and activity mats. You can read more about the reasons behind this here.
Bouncers, loungers, swings, and bumbo seats. (Yes, this includes DockATot and RockATot.) Read more about the reasons why here. Be aware that there are recalls and serious safety concerns about most of these products. Even if you are offered these products for free or secondhand, we highly encourage you to avoid them.
Books to read with your baby
There are a lot of lists out there with a focus on inclusion, social justice, body positivity, etc. We’ve compiled several of these lists you can peruse here.
Do you have favorite books from when you were little? Those can be fun to register for too!
Pro tip: re-read them to make sure you still stand by them, just in case
It can also be sweet to ask others to purchase their favorite children's books for your baby. You can encourage them to write an inscription in the book too as a special touch.
Playthings
Check out our blog post about infant and toddler toys for ideas!
Services
Some parents like to ask their loved ones to help them pay for additional support and education services as they welcome a new baby. A few common examples:
Birth doula: Support during pregnancy and labor
Postpartum doula: Support in the weeks and months after your baby arrives
House cleaning
Good luck putting together your registry!
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